I've been hearing things -- bad things about you, so different from the version of you I enjoyed hanging out with just days ago. Are they true? A part of me doesn't want to believe what they say, another part doesn't want to listen at all. Kasi nalulungkot ako para sa'yo. Do you know how you've become the butt of hushed harsh jokes lately? Hindi ako makatawa, kasi parang mali. Na I've thought so highly of whatever ease we've managed to craft between us, tapos hahayaan kong masira ng bulung-bulungan.
Pero, really, totoo ba? I want to give you the benefit of the doubt -- pero alam mo, parang ayoko rin marinig kung ano ang sasabihin mo. When you deny everything, who will I believe? My trusted friends, or the newfound friend I have in you? Parang ayokong umabot pa sa ganung point. Worse, paano kung aminin mo na totoo lahat? Saan ako lulugar? Maniniwala ba akong totoo rin yung kwentuhan natin? Or was it all just part of your big macho show, at nagkataon lang na ako yung tangang nakisakay sa trip mo pagkatapos nilang lahat? Just thinking about how stupid I must've seemed to you in that setup makes me want to throw up. Then again, I can't imagine you playing me -- hindi ko naman naramdaman na you were being nice to me in that sense (I don't have that long a history in that department, anyway).
Ewan.
Siguro nga biased ako para kampihan ka this time around. Pero hindi ko alam, may naramdaman akong kabutihang-loob mo na kutob ko totoo, and whatever distorted version of you comes out of the murmurs in the smoking room, or in the ladies' room, or beyond it, I'll stick to my guns on this one and hold judgment until I hear your side of the story -- and should you never tell me your version, you can trust me to remember you as that nice laid-back funny guy I was stuck with for hours. No judgements, no grapevine tales, no silent treatments.
I'll keep my ears at bay, right here with my heart.
