It's funny how one eventually gets used to doing something that seems so difficult at first. Like going to the gym, for instance. Or refusing to bite one's nails when your nerves are on end. Or presenting boards and radio scripts to faceless clients in the telecon room. After a couple runs at it, you get the feeling you might actually be good at what you're doing. Sure, one messes up sometimes, but that's normal. That doesn't mean you can't be good.
Bihira na kitang hanap-hanapin. I guess that came with practice, too. It was difficult to turn down lunch invitations, and avoid passing by your desk whenever I had the chance. It was difficult to pretend I was busy whenever you dropped by. Until it came to me how I could actually be good at this staying away from you business. Of course, every two hours, I mess up a bit, and smile your way. Or check to see if you've already come in for the day. Or ask you if you'd like to have coffee with me.
You've been making it easier lately. You don't come by that often. You don't even look my way most of the time. Sometimes, an entire day passes and we don't even get a glimpse of each other.
With just a little more practice, we might actually get it right one day and completely forget, and I won't have to miss you so much when I stay out of your way.
Like I do today.
