You make me so sad sometimes. The way you forget I'm even here.
Maybe if I don't hang around you too much, or clamor for your attention, or your company, you'll miss me enough to demand I spend the day with you, too. Maybe if I stop texting, or replying too quick, you'd start saying you miss me too. Maybe if I eat lunch less with you, and have more dinners with my friends, or go to the gym more often, you'd notice I'm gone. Or you'd remember how we used to be two peas in a pod, and we're not anymore.
Things change, after all. How many times have I been through this? Being too attached to someone for my own good? Relying too much on someone for my happiness, or for feeling accepted, or for being acknowledged? How many times have I drifted off from someone, and be so far off path I don't even remember what it used to be like? Too many times for me to be surprised, I guess, that it's happening all over again.
It's kind of sad. I liked our tandem. It was good fun. There was never a dull moment. Now we've swapped conversations for Angry Birds and e-mails and downloading apps. What happened?
You know what, it's okay. I understand. Actually I don't. But I'll pretend I can. Maybe it's about time we spread our wings a bit and stretched our circle of friends. That's exactly what I'll do.
You know how you suddenly feel a wound has become more painful once you've seen the cut? I feel it everyday now. Every second. And it slices through me.
But don't worry, I'll be fine. As I always eventually have.
Yes, I'm convincing myself.
